Crystal Maidens Review

Crystal Maidens

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The full Crystal Maidens review

From what I can gather, you guys absolutely love the adult games section on my website – I keep getting hits here and I think that’s because when it comes to reviewing these types of products, I’m the king. Before I started Mr. Porn Geek, I was actually a huge fan of gaming: I even hit Challenger in League of Legends (admittedly it was on the Oceania server, but still) and used to play Battlefield 2 competitive. Nowadays I’m an adult, so I’ve got to act like one: but that’s not going to stop me from enjoying some good porn games now, is it? Today’s review is of Crystal Maidens: let’s fire this puppy up and see what’s on offer.

Another Nutaku masterpiece

Before I begin, I should let you know that Crystal Maidens is owned and operated by Nutaku: these guys are fucking fantastic when it comes to producing games and I’ve written reviews on many of their titles including Cunt Wars, Fap CEO and Booty Calls. Signing up is completely free to this website and they’re about as honest as it gets when it comes to offering premium porn titles at a freemium level. That’s right – Crystal Maidens is FREE to play. You practically have no excuse not to check it out if I rate this place well, so let’s get into it and see what’s on offer, shall we?

What the hell is Crystal Maidens?

Crystal Maidens is tagged as being an RTS and adventure game: I’ve always had a thing for those types of titles! It’s entirely browser based and runs through the WebGL API – this isn’t Flash-based, which I think is pretty good. Anyway, the very first thing that happens in Crystal Maidens is that you find yourself on a beach, having your cock sucked by a sexy maiden that’s naked and has … horns? Not my standard fetish, but something I can work with! Turns out that you were on a ship and it started to sink – you got washed up on the shore and Nuka came to rescue you. You’re soon told about a dark wizard that you need to conquer and she hands over an amulet that you can use to summon allies in your quest to destroy this retched foe.

The first interactive aspect of Crystal Maidens is when you collect a free item immediately after leaving the beach. I’m guessing everyone gets the same reward – it’s a card of Selena, also known as ‘The Brilliant Duelist’. You’ll begin the campaign soon after: at this point, I recommend taking the game into full-screen mode by hitting the blue button in the bottom right-hand corner. The artwork here is absolutely beautiful if I’m honest with you: seems like Nutaku have gone above and beyond to actually deliver a polished, final product – I can’t say I’m surprised at this point.

The XXX gameplay for porn lovers

Okay, so what’s the gameplay like? Well you basically place down your miaden and they’ll surge into battle. You have a few buttons you can hit to perform different attacks and I’m guessing that as the title progresses, more unlock or powerful characters get a bigger range of interactive abilities. The first two battles basically play themselves and soon enough, you’ll be level 2. The level-up was quite grand, even though I didn’t feel like I achieved all that much: I’m hoping that level 3 and onward are a little more challenging. One thing Mr. Porn Geek loves is a tough game – especially when it’s as fun as Crystal Maidens.

What’s quite interesting is that you level up your Maidens using these gems that allow you to flirt with the beauties in question. When leveling up, Maidens receive a 10% boost to their health points, damage and defense: you wouldn’t want your sexy broads going into battle without the proper stats now, would you? Maidens can also be equipped with higher quality weapons, such as wands, to make them do more damage.

Eventually, the chick you caught sucking your cock at the beach will want to fuck you and that’s where the animations and porn aspect of Crystal Maidens comes into play. While battling enemies and defeating wizards is cool and all, we’re playing these types of titles for porn primarily, so I’m glad that the rendered fucking is pretty damn hot. It’s not quite hentai style if I’m honest, but it’s certainly not fully Western either – a nice blend is probably the best way to describe what you get at Crystal Maidens.

Unlocks and more on Crystal Maidens

As you continue to progress, you’ll unlock a bunch of new Maidens and other cool things to help you with your quest. For the first 15 minutes your hand is held quite extensively to help you understand all of the various elements that this game brings: the tutorial is quite decent and since the mechanics can be a little complicated, I’m happy they do this. For me, I feel like Crystal Maidens is mainly a strategy game based around smart decision making before the battle plays out. It’s a macro-orientated RTS with not much micro involved, seeing as the Maidens just run into battle like crazy warlords and don’t seem to have much interest in higher-level tactics. Stats here are the crucial part of the game, so managing equipment, level-ups and so on is what you’ll want to get good at.

Extra features and considerations

Like many free to play games, Crystal Maidens offers you rewards for each and every day that you return. The first day is 500 silver coins, tomorrow’s is 5 energy points and the day after delivers 5 red gems. The rewards gradually get better and better – often doubling every week or so. After 14 days and 28 days, you also unlock the maidens Coral and Roxelana respectively. I wish I could write reviews on these sexy sluts but sadly, I simply don’t have the time. I recommend after the tutorial you also visit the shop for free gacha.

As mentioned, Crystal Maidens is free to play, but you can pay a little extra if you want to get a leg up on everyone else. The red gems are used to unlock crates, which can contain lots of goodies that are above-average in terms of quality. I tried this feature out and got a pretty cool headpiece upgrade (Might Knight’s Helmet) which offered me some stellar stats compared to the normal stuff you’ll find.

You’ll probably buy normal and premium crates above everything else if you want to flash your cash. I did some math and if you buy in bulk with the 20,000 Nutaku coin option, the normal crates work out to be 5 cents each and the premium ones 25 cents – you can also just pick a premium items crate which runs slightly cheaper (but has no chance of receiving a Maiden) for 15 cents. Pretty low prices to be honest, so it’s not like one of those freemium mobile games that bleed you dry as soon as you play it.

My Crystal Maidens conclusion

Look, Mr. Porn Geek loves games and honestly, I think that Crystal Maidens is a fantastic example of a title that you’ll enjoy if you want a higher quality choice in this market. It’s completely free, Nutaku have a track record of creating masterpieces and this game is no exception. Honestly, head on over and give Crystal Maidens a shot – like I say, it’s 100% free, so you’ve got nothing to lose and everything to gain!

Review Pros
  • Fantastic gameplay
  • Browser based
  • Produced by Nutaku
Review Cons
  • No iOS version
  • Some time gating